Kc Rossi 0:02
Are you ready to scale your business in a way that's aligned with your soul and profitable? I'm Kc Rossi, a business and leadership coach. I've been a full time entrepreneur for 30 years and love business. I help conscious leaders increase their impact and optimize their lives. Join me each week for tips and deep conversations on cultivating confidence, increasing your visibility, elevating your vibration, and leading with purpose without burning out. Let's go.
Kc Rossi 0:36
My guest today is Pauline Nguyen. Pauline is one of Australia's most impactful speakers and developmental coaches. She draws from both contemporary science and Agent modalities. And her teachings have helped countless professionals experience exponential business growth, greater health, deeper, intimate relationships and spiritual awakenings. I love how Pauline merries material success with deep fulfillment and a great sense of play. We are absolutely on the same page. This was one of my favorite interviews and you can really feel a sense of Pauline's passion and authenticity. In fact, this was a Zoom interview, you're only hearing the audio, but when she was answering questions, it was almost like she was looking off to the side and getting this download from above. It was really beautiful. So I hope you feel that really high vibration, and catch a spark. So you too can experience deep fulfillment, as well as material success. Enjoy.
Kc Rossi 1:37
Pauline, It's so thrilling for me to have you a guest on the show. Thank you so much for being here.
Pauline Nguyen 1:42
You're welcome. It is my joy. Thank you so much for having me.
Kc Rossi 1:46
Yeah, I'm excited to dive in. As I was mentioning to you, I was able to just cruise around the interwebs and take in some of your essence. And I really feel this beautiful warrior energy that you transmit, and it inspired me. And I can really feel that it inspires many people around the globe. And I'm wondering where that comes from?
Pauline Nguyen 2:11
I love that word, warrior energy. And I have a joke with a lot of my students and my clients we go it's warrior not worrier. You are a warrior or are you a worrier? Kc, I can definitely say it comes from many, many lifetimes, many lifetimes. And so, when we are called to a particular energetics when we are called to do particular things, understanding that if something is your calling, you will have already experienced that many times in other lifetimes. Let's talk about this lifetime, this lifetime. My warrior energy would definitely have come from my childhood. I didn't grow up in the best environments. My family and I are a boat people. We escaped Vietnam after the war. We spent nine days out at sea a year in a refugee camp in Thailand, and coming to Australia, my father who had already experienced the horrors at war, he suffered terribly from PTSD. So coming to a new country, having escaped by boat, and coming to this new country, with nothing after spending a year in the refugee camp. I was four years old, my brother Louis was three, my mother gave birth to my younger brother, Luke in the refugee camp. So my father came into this new world with nothing, two young children, a newborn, a wife, who suffered from tuberculosis, and had to do all the things he needed to do and in your country, as well as all the PTSD and violence that he grew up with. So he had nowhere to dump his anger, but on my mother and and on us kids. So growing up was incredibly violent, and also dealing with the new wave of immigrants to Australia at the time. So there was a lot of racism growing up, there was a lot of confusion about identity and displacement. But most of all, having a very violent father at home, who was so driven because he wanted to make sure that the sacrifices here my mother made will honor God, and so we will push to get good grades as well. He opened quite the Empire in the heart of Cabret matters bustling commercial district, it was where a lot of our fellow, our fellow countrymen and women came to set up businesses and set up their lives. So he created quite the Empire. And this is where my entrepreneurial streak was. As literally beaten into me. So I grew up working full time at the age of seven. And then on top of that, having to get good grades as well and having to perform and deliver for my dad. So it was very much the warrior energy, the entrepreneurial spirit, and the ferocious work ethic was literally beaten into us. But you know what I can tell all those stories now, without getting upset, because I have healed. And I look back now and I choose to see all of that as my training as my training, because I just don't do victim very well.
Kc Rossi 5:36
Yeah, absolutely. What an incredible story. And I find it so interesting that the entrepreneurial spirit being literally beaten into you, because for me, you would either run away from it or run towards it. And my first instinct is that you would run away from it if it was forced. And I love the fact that you turn that trauma into your treasure. And one of the quotes I heard you say, now makes total sense, which is "how we do crisis is how we do life." And I can see that now illuminated in your story. And I would love it if you wanted to expand more on that thought, and how you've overlaid some of those learning lessons into what you currently do and how you currently help people today?
Pauline Nguyen 6:18
Absolutely. Let's take the word current, the word literally stopped for us to reinvent ourselves did it not. And as entrepreneurs and in the space that we're in, we, I've been able to observe, so many people take the last two years, right, the last two years, the world literally stopped for us to reinvent ourselves. And one of the things that I'm hoping a lot of people can really grasp now is that change is going to happen at a faster rate than ever, ever before. You know, but how many, I'm an international speaker. And I often am asked to go into organizations and speak to the topic of change. And witnessing how many people start to get angry at the organization's get angry at the world get angry at the way things are as like, wait a minute, why are you getting angry? Change is the only constant. Change is the only constant. And that's where I started to think war crisis doesn't change people crisis reveals them. How you do crisis is how you do life. Will you be the warrior? Or will you be the warrior? Because, you're going to be left behind?
Kc Rossi 7:38
Yeah
Pauline Nguyen 7:39
The trains already left the station, you're going to be left behind if we don't adapt if we don't get flexible, if we don't, you know, it's it's not survival of the fittest anymore. It's survival of the most fitting. Yeah. And once we can adapt to change,
Kc Rossi 7:57
Yeah, 100% I feel like this dovetails into a lot of what you speak about when you talk about personal development cannot happen until personal disruption occurs. First, I am so curious about that. It's very intriguing to me, and I feel that it it absolutely correlates to all of the personal disruptions that we've had since 2020. And this opportunity to reinvent ourselves, and to peel back the layers of things that we were dissatisfied with anyway, and get to change those.
Pauline Nguyen 8:28
Absolutely. And the numerology of 2022 is very much about letting go of the old so that we can invite in the new. But in order to let go of the old, we're going to have to reinvent and self destruct/self disrupt ourselves. And so if we think our job is to stay the same, and when people say things like polling if change is like, plenty, I've changed, I've done deliberately. It is our what my children are watching me. My students are watching me, my clients are watching me, we're here on this earth to do three things, three things, one to evolve, to evolve. Sure, we grow naturally, our hairs growing, our fingers are growing our skins growing as we speak, but how are we doing it consciously? How are we doing it consciously? What stage of development? Are you at? You know, do you really want to just see things from the same worldview from the same container? That's not a very fulfilling life. And fulfillment is the new currency. But in order to continually if you choose to grow, then we're going to have to continue to self interrogate, self disrupt ourselves. And so we're here to evolve. You doing are you doing it consciously? Or are you just evolving unconsciously? We're here to push humanity forward. What are you doing to contribute to your species to continue attribute to your world to evolve to push humanity forward, that also involves upskilling. That also involves learning new things. The more you learn, the longer you're going to live. That's just your genetics. It's just that's what happens. The more you choose not to develop yourself, you're going to die in earlier age, because you're not becoming expansive. And the third is to do it with joy to do it with joy. That's the part that people find the hardest to do, right? Because they don't, what I can do all this in a state of grace and inspiration and joy, that's when you're going to grow the faster.
Kc Rossi 10:36
Absolutely, that's my tagline is breathe joy. And I'm a firm believer of that when we can do that, I want to rewind to the point of changing the status quo and dive deeper into the personal disruption. If we have listeners where fear is bubbling up, when they think of the word disruption, when maybe they haven't had as much time to have personal reflection or deep insight. What can sue the monkey mind when they're thinking about disruption?
Pauline Nguyen 11:10
The first is it always starts with a decision. Right? It always starts with the decision, the decision to ask yourself, Do I want to feel these feelings? First decision? No, I no longer want to feel this fear, F E A R, false evidence appearing real false emotions appearing real, right? And so the first step, make the choice? Do I want to continue feeling sad? Do I want to continue feeling fearful, as soon as you make that decision, then we can take the next step, the next step being asking for permission, or letting giving others permission, first giving permission to yourself, and asking for permission or giving permission to someone who can assist you. And so, if we can understand this is another point of personal disruption, a lot of fear, a lot of the emotions of fear, a lot of the emotions of anxiety is because you're either living in the past, comparing what situation you are now, to the past where you showed fear or anxiety, or you're, you're referring to or living in the future, in the state of your imagination, fear, anxiety, overwhelm, rarely, rarely exists when we are in the present moment to do what needs to be done in the present moment. And understanding that anxiety is a process, right? It's a process. So giving someone permission, can you help me with this place? Perhaps I can help you with some breath work. So you can start to disrupt some of your biochemistry to disrupt some of the addictions you have to the emotions of the past? Can Can you help me please, to change the stories that I'm fighting to hold on to? Can you help me please change some of the stories that I've been telling myself about myself and believe? Can you help me please? upskill a little bit more, can you help me a bit, please, with some emotional work with some mental work with some physical work with some soul work. And so the first is the decision. And then either giving someone permission or asking permission, and then we've got to GOYA, get off your ass and get off your ass and act. And so it's it's very much about also, sustainability that requires work, this stuff doesn't come easily, right? Because please give yourself some grace as well, because you are now disrupting decades, decades of co2 stress because you've been breathing incorrectly. Because you've been having toxic thoughts. Give yourself some grace. But the faster you can surround yourself with those who can assist you, and you do the Goya with consistency and follow through, then you really start to design designing, then you start designing, and you start vibrating at a different frequency. And all of a sudden, you've got more amazing high quality friends and you're having a fun life because you're always energized. You're always energized in spirit and inspired. That's the spirituality that I teach.
Kc Rossi 14:21
Yeah, I love it. I feel it. I'm totally in alignment with it. And that powerful synergy between asking for support in areas that have been illuminated that are gaps and taking accountability and responsibility and consistent action. So super powerful. I'm curious, when did you realize that it wasn't an either or when it came to personal wealth and personal fulfillment? But a, yes, and.
Pauline Nguyen 14:53
Yes, I think it also depends on what stage of development we are at Kc also depends on our personality type, for example, what Enneagram? We are, what human design we are, there are those who are designed to only see either or.
Kc Rossi 15:10
Yeah, right, that mindset.
Pauline Nguyen 15:13
That some of those are design. But again, it becomes a decision, do I want to have this do I want to be like this. Whereas for someone like myself, if I were to talk, with direct experience, I have the personality that says, give me more, give me more points of view. So it can come a lot easier for me than it can for others. This is where compassion comes online. Compassion for self, if you've always seen an either or proposal, there are coaches, and there are teachers who can assist to get you to the next stage of development. So so many people say stuck or can't get unstuck. It's simply a case of, you just need a little bit of assistance to get you unstuck to the next stage of development, where you get more insights, more worldviews, and you keep evolving and evolving and evolving. So to answer your question, as best I can, Kc, it really started when I actually did run away from home. I ran away from home when I was 16. I spent many years hiding from my father. And that was the the time in my life where it's like this, this can't can't be my life, there has to be a better life than this. And so I ran away, heat out for many years, and pretty much fended for myself, and put myself through university and got jobs all around the world. But back to when I really put my foot down and said enough, was when I decided to have children. So when I decided, I decided when I turned 30 That I cannot be this person, I cannot be this person. I was still carrying childhood trauma, I was still angry, angry at the world angry, I grew up exactly like my father trauma gets passed down the generations if it's not resolved, right. And so it was around that decision, you know, I was a smoker, I was a party animal, you know, I partied a lot. I had no self worth. I had no, no, actually, let's change that I didn't have self respect. Okay, I had self worth, I didn't have self respect. And it was that instant, the Never underestimate the power of a decision. When I said, I'm going to now attempt to have a child, I cannot be this person. For my future child. Once the decision was made, I stopped partying, I stopped smoking instantly, instantly, because it no longer became about myself. I loved that I became about another person. And that's where I really started to dive deep to not only work on my mindset, but also the strength of my heart, the strength of my body, the flexibility of my thoughts. But most of all, I started to work on my spirit, I started to work on myself.
Kc Rossi 18:13
Yeah, that's amazing. You mentioned self worth, and then shifted to self respect. But I want to just go back to the worthiness piece, because I feel that that is a very common root issue that gets in the way of personal development, business acceleration. I'm wondering what you would share if we're when we're thinking about like the number one way to ignite worthiness?
Pauline Nguyen 18:38
Do stuff, do stuff. A lot of people say to themselves, and I'm only saying this through observation, this is not through hallucination. This is through observation. I've coached and taught many students and clients and what what am I asked the question, what would need to happen in order for you to feel a sense of self worth? And one of the first questions that I hear time and time again, is, if I were to have achieved some things, then I'm worthy. Okay, worthy of what? And then it depends on what would make them feel worthy. And in the entrepreneurial space is where I play, if I've achieved accolades, if I have validation from my peers, if I did this, this this, this this, okay, what would need to happen in order for you to get validation in order to get done, and I would need to have accomplished some things. Okay. What would you like to accomplish? Let's go do some stuff, right? And then the more you and but understanding that our soul does not want us to achieve our stole wants us to grow. And so the more we we do stuff, the more we're acquiring new skills, the more we we take that achievement I wanted, I want to become A ballroom dancer, what are you gonna do about it? I want to experience more joy. All right, what are you gonna do about it? Because Joy ain't gonna knock on your door baby. You know, I want to be able to, you know, feel good on the inside so I can attract that guy. Alright, what do you need to do to feel the way you want to feel?
Kc Rossi 20:20
Yeah
Pauline Nguyen 20:21
Very important question. And so do you think the more more growth, the more things you get accomplished, the more worthy the more self worth you're going to achieve? Of course it is. And so that's why I made that tweak at the beginning, because I've done so much stuff. You know, I fended for myself, I've done so many things. So the sense of self worth, I know that I have great worth, I know that I'm worthy. I'm consistently learning, I'm consistently doing interesting things. But in those days, I didn't have the same amount of self respect that I that I do now, respect for my body, respect for my health, respect for my mind, and which is why a big part of what I teach is GOYA - Get off your ass.
Kc Rossi 21:03
And I love that. That's a beautiful perspective, and I haven't heard it broken down. So simply, and I can see where that would be very effective. One of the things that I'm thinking about is when you talk about the achievement, and that drive for validation, it's very external, and it feels mental. And then on the flip side, when you talk about joyful evolution, and the soul's purpose is growth. I'm wondering what you personally do to integrate those two sides of the coin.
Pauline Nguyen 21:35
Okay, and so, again, it depends on the question, What has my life already demonstrated? When I when I come off stage, and because I have a ferocious growth mindset, when I come off stage, and I constantly am striving for mastery. That's the beautiful thing about the word mastery. It's never an end, there's always another tweak, there's always something else. And so when I get off stage, and people say, Oh, my God, Paula, you're amazing. You know, I'm data driven. And so the next question I always ask them is, can you please tell me why I was amazing. Right? I'm not wanting the validation that they found amazing. I've done this enough to know that I'm bloody good at what I do. But please, can you give me a little bit more data? So that I can say that I can be internally again, disrupting, disrupting, becoming better becoming better? And so check in with yourself check in? Are you doing this? so other people can make you feel good? Or are you doing this check in with your Somatics? Are you doing this so that you can evolve? So with that evolution that you can contribute a little bit more,
Kc Rossi 22:52
That's bringing up so much for me on a personal basis, because I've done a lot of work on perfectionism. And so when I hear that information about like chasing validation, I feel like we can have a whole nother episode. Just on that. It's really powerful. I'm curious, how do we command self mastery?
Pauline Nguyen 23:13
It's a cultivation of a practice. It's another decision. And so what? First of all, I wanted to also tweak that word. I've assisted a lot of high achievers, when I changed the word perfection for them to the word excellence. Because what is perfect, what they like, they hold on to the word perfection. And that's where they suffer, because it can never be perfect. Everyone has a different interpretation of perfect, but did you do with excellence? And excellence, again, is very different for everyone. And so, back to your question, Kc, it's, first of all, know who you are, know who you are. And what does that mean? It means get super clear. And this is with we're talking about, I guess, the behavioral science, the neuroscience. The science of achievement, I guess, also, what stage of development? Are you at? Get super real with it there. If you don't know where you are? How do you know where you need to go? Know yourself, what are your strengths? What are you really really good at? Or are you listening to other people? Because most people live in error detection mode, right? What are my errors? And then you've got mom and dad and teachers and you know lovers doing all your errors? Oh my god, they're in error detection mode or a prevalent human condition? Or are we in joy mode, praise mode, beauty mode, have a look, what are you good at what are your strengths, and then work on concentrating and increasing your strength, become masterful at your strength? How can I increase my skills to become more because when When checking against somatically, does this make my body contract? If so, don't do mastery there? You ain't going to achieve it? Or does it make my body sing? Does it make my body expand? Okay, you realize that now how you're going to increase your skill set and your knowledge in that area to acquire new ones. Know yourself, discover where in these areas? Do you have intellectual arrogance, that is going to cause the sense of ignorance over and over again, it's like, if I could give you an example, I'm not designed for numbers. I can I'm very good at making money. Jobs, tell me put on a spreadsheet, and then tell me a story. I'm not designed for numbers. And I'm sure that you have as well, Kc gone to numerous, you know, accounting seminars or business seminars where they're paid people go, love your numbers, and your numbers will love us that Yeah, but I don't love numbers. You know, this is where I'm going to become really ignorant. Of course, I know where I'm at, I'm just not going to force myself to be good at it. This is where I'm going to delegate delegate so that I can focus on my mastery. And the mastery part also is consistent questioning, is this going to elevate me when someone says to me, you know, fall in love with your numbers, and your numbers will fall in love with you? Okay, I'm actually going to question that. Because while this whole room of accountants get it, I don't, I don't know. It's gonna make sense to me, that's gonna be wasting my time, it's going to put me to several steps back. And then also, we know where does mastery come from? It also comes from that reference point being this one, this instrument of consciousness, am I expansive? Am I contracting? am I waking up with no external motivation to get me to where I want to be? It is this intrinsic inspiration, this intrinsic motivation, then, you know, that's the era you want to become masterful at, and not to not to be afraid to run in your own lane. You know, so many people, it's that, you know, I need the validation, I need to be mainstream. It's like, Yeah, but it's already crowded.
Kc Rossi 27:25
It's so crowded there, and it's boring. And I feel like this goes back to the disruption. That's what's gonna bring people towards you, like you are very magnetic. And there is just this level of, yes. What else are you going to say? Like, I want to listen to Pauline. And so I feel like that's really really powerful. And and I love the fact that you're bringing in the body work, the breath work, and I feel for high achievers, we can often get stuck in the To Do lists, and being a taskmaster and have the disconnection with with embodiment. So I really love that these simple techniques like breath work, understanding the somatics of contraction and expansion. If we can just implement those little micro changes in the day, I feel that's going to elevate our consciousness as well.
Pauline Nguyen 28:16
Yeah, a big part of my non negotiables is nature's medicine as well. Not only are we disconnected with nature, we forget that we are nature, we are nature, we are here to awaken and remember, remember that we are nature, but also to reattach our member, reattach our bodies back to nature. And I have some certain non negotiables that I do on a daily basis. And today's beautiful and rainy, I'm still going to get out there to connect myself, what are we doing? What are we doing, we are connecting ourselves not only neutralizing the harmful effects of the artificial EMS, you know, what we do is sitting in front of the computer all day, we're on our iPhones all day, I'm not going to give up technology, I'm not going to, but I'm going to know how to manage it and manage myself so that I'm in peak state, but also to understand there's a whole lot of science behind nature's medicine, but for me, I am in in harmony with the vibration of the Creator. Do you think I'm going to be in spirit and inspired to find the solutions to my problems? When I'm out there in nature swimming in her ocean? Building up my solar colors in her son in her sun rays, walking barefoot on the ground to discharge a positive ions? Do you think I'm going to be in harmony with the gamma brainwaves and just reduce my chances of getting sick, increasing my chances of inspiration? Creation collaboration, you know, pulling we need a business meeting. Okay, if we're not going to do it via zoom, we're going to go for a walk or we're going to watch the ocean and drink a bottle of champagne? And do you think that's going to increase my chances of being in spirit and inspired to find the solutions to my to my issues? You know, and being an entrepreneur and having multiple business issues?
Kc Rossi 30:15
Yeah, no, absolutely. I took a digital detox from social media in December for three weeks. And I could feel the shifts on a cellular level. And it just, it made me really question everything it was it was really powerful. And I wasn't planning on going past two weeks. And then I actually had to motivate myself to get back into it at the end of the day. No, but it is a necessary part of being a digital business owner, but it is so very powerful. I love it. I have one last question that I wanted to ask you. And we hear a lot about vulnerability and authenticity in how we market talking about social media and being online. And I'm just wondering if you have any advice for listeners that are finding it difficult to actually implement that, you know, what does it really look like to be authentic and vulnerable, and still maintain a level of professionalism and expertise?
Pauline Nguyen 31:16
Sure. That's a wonderful question, Kc, because there's so many layers, if we're talking about first and foremost, those who have some blockage to actually put themselves out there. The answer is really simple. If you want to remain invisible, remain invisible. People aren't going to see you, unless you put yourself out there. And I hear all the time, people accusing other people, I've also been accused of oversharing, you know, and it's like, okay, oversharing for your paradigm. But there's a difference between contribution, sharing thoughts, sharing ideas, and exposing what is very private. That's privacy is very different, you maintain your private issues, because that's not stuff people want to hear, right. But let's talk about collective downloads, right collective downloads, the event managers in the quantum field, some 10-15 years ago, downloaded, now we have social media. Now we have the internet, like over 20 years ago. Now it's time for us human beings to connect, we have a duty to share our thoughts, share our feelings, why so that people can resonate, so that people can relate, right. But if you don't want to play in the box of mainstream, create your own box, because those who will see you who can see, you will always see you, those who can't see, you will never see you, those who will hear you will always hear you, those who can hear you, those who can't hear you will never hear you Lalala lalalala, because they are at the stage of development that you're not at. And so a lot of courage comes online. But here's the thing, you can't be an interesting person with interesting stories to tell if you don't do interesting things. So you got to GOYA, get off your ass, learn interesting things do interesting things. And let's talk about vulnerability vulnerability. For me my definition of vulnerability, is the potent value exchange of authentic expression, is your value exchange going to be potent? And is your expression a authentic one, that's what vulnerability is, let me complete what my definition of vulnerability is. The potent value exchange of authentic expression, without the fear of what other people will think that's the big part. This is my potent value exchange of authentic expression, and how you react or how you respond is not going to affect me.
Kc Rossi 34:09
I love that! and I love that Pauline. And it really just comes to mind this bold courageousness without attachment. You know and and that's that's a beautiful, a beautiful spot to be in. I got the chills when you were talking about that. And I usually ask my guests what final bright light words of wisdom they want to share. But I feel like this whole entire interaction has been so with with gems and just golden rays of purity, and I really appreciate that. So thank you. It's truly been one of my most favorite exchanges and interviews. Oh, so very much.
Pauline Nguyen 34:53
I have appreciated your questions also. Kc, thank you so very much.
Kc Rossi 34:57
Awesome. It's been a pleasure, Pauline. Thank you.
Pauline Nguyen 34:59
Likewise, thank you so much.
Kc Rossi 35:01
I hope you enjoy today's episode with Pauline. I thought she was fabulous. In fact, they went right out and bought her book, The Way of the spiritual entrepreneur and I've already started diving in. It's fabulous. She has such an incredible story. And just, to me, it's really kind of grit in motion. So it's absolutely awesome. If you enjoyed today's episode, you can certainly rate and review the podcast at -www.lovethepodcast.com/brilliance. And I'm going to share some feedback from SH Elliot from US. And they say "I am inspired and enlightened. Kc has awesome guests and always manages to get the best out of them. Thank you for sharing tips and tools for business success." Sh Eliot, thank you so much for taking the time to share your feedback. I love my guests. In fact, it's funny I sometimes chuckle because nine out of 10 of my guests I want to hire I think they're absolutely fabulous individuals really on a mission and lighting up their own trail, I just love to see trailblazers, blazing their own way really making the space to allow ourselves to dream bigger, and to get in touch with exactly what we want. And it inspires us to do the exact same thing because if one person can do it, we can all do it. We all have that innate power within us. So if you would like to leave your feedback about the podcast, you can head on over to www.lovethepodcast.com/brilliance. Thank you!
