The Most Effective Strategies for Overcoming FOMO and Finding Peace
Kc Rossi (00:00:02) - Are you ready to scale your business in a way that's aligned with your soul and profitable? I'm Kc Rossi, a Business and Leadership Coach. I've been a full-time entrepreneur for 30 years and love business. I help conscious leaders increase their impact and optimize their lives. Join me each week for tips and deep conversations on cultivating confidence, increasing your visibility, elevating your vibration, and leading with purpose without burning out. Let's go!
Hello and welcome back to the podcast, where we explore the secrets to success and fulfillment for high achievers and solopreneurs. Today we're exploring something that entrepreneurs and execs struggle with, and that is FOMO; the acronym for Fear of Missing Out. Let's unpack this together and see how FOMO impacts your work-life balance, why it's so pervasive among high achievers, and, of course, actionable steps that you can take to conquer it.
Plus, we'll be sharing some inspiring insights and practical tips to help you reclaim your time and peace of mind. Sound good?
FOMO, or the fear of missing out, is the anxiety that others are having rewarding experiences that you are not a part of.
Kc Rossi (00:01:27) - It's a powerful driver of behavior, especially in our hyperconnected world. The constant bombardment of success stories and highlight reels on social media can exasperate FOMO, creating unrealistic comparisons and pressures.
When was the last time that you were scrolling on Insta, drooling over a friend's beach pics on Capri, or a colleague's recent promotion, or Gala pics on LinkedIn?
Research from the University of Essex found that FOMO can negatively affect mental health, leading to increased stress and decreased life satisfaction. It's so interesting, isn't it, because we actually get to control this. This is something that, through our own perception and awareness and choice to change the habit, we can turn around.
So I just want to look at that little piece of science. If research is found that fear of missing out can negatively affect your mental health. Holy smokes. If they have found that it actually leads to stress and decreased life satisfaction, why do we keep doing it to ourselves? So we're going to take a deeper look at that.
Some of the symptoms of FOMO that you can be on the lookout for include boredom, distraction, fatigue, and loneliness.
Kc Rossi (00:03:03) - An interesting fact here is, according to a survey from Reviews.org 71% of people check their phone within ten minutes of waking up. 71%! Now talk about letting society dictate your emotional status before you have even gotten in your first hundred steps.
I started personally noticing that my screen time has increased lately. I used to be very mindful with this and double check you know my usage on my phone and just make sure that it wasn't getting wonky. But it didn't take long before that time expanded. It's kind of like wearing stretchy pants for a while. And then when you go to try to zip up real jeans, you know what I'm talking about... It's like a rude awakening. So I went out and about yesterday with my bestie and left my phone in the car. It started to become a joke how many times I said, oh, it's on my phone. Oh, I wanted to show you this cool video. Oh, but it's on my phone. Oh, this new pic of my niece.
Kc Rossi (00:04:08) - Oh, it's on my phone. Let me see if I'm available for that thing on that day. Oh, it's on my Google calendar... on my phone. So honestly, I was caught off guard by the reliance, and it's causing me to ponder my need to be connected and attached. A big topic to explore, probably for another episode.
But suffice it to say that if you struggle with this, too know that I am right alongside you, figuring it out and readjusting as needed. Nonetheless, mindlessly scrolling on the daily provides an onslaught of other people's experiences, glam shots, and accolades that can cause feelings of inadequacy and thoughts that the best of life is passing you by. Here is the ray of sunshine truth. So if you had your big yellow highlighter, you would be highlighting this piece right here, right now.
If you get in the driver's seat of your life and limit your exposure, you also limit FOMO. If you reduce your inputs, you will naturally reduce your anxiety about not being included or a nagging feeling that everyone else is gobbling up all the cool things.
Kc Rossi (00:05:25) - Let's look at it through a professional lens. FOMO can lead to over-commitment and the ability to say no, resulting in an unbalanced life. I know because you're listening to this, the work-life balance is important to you. And I also feel that in your heart you know that it's possible, even though it may feel elusive or sometimes even like true balance with all of that is a farce.
This sensation of FOMO pushes us to take on more than we can handle, stretch ourselves too thin, and neglect our personal well-being. I see this a lot, both in the business world and the nonprofit sector, and you might be shaking your head being like, yeah, absolutely. So I mean, it makes sense, right? The inbox keeps piling up. The high achiever has a big heart and a difficult time saying no and boundaries can get blurred. Or maybe they were never even set up in the first place.
Saying no to opportunities that don't align with your priorities is essential.
Kc Rossi (00:06:36) - It's not about rejecting everything, but about making space for what truly matters. Constantly chasing every opportunity leads to burnout. You can't sustain high levels of productivity without adequate rest and relaxation. I mean, just the space, right? Space for breath, space for awe and wonder and curiosity, and just space. Just white space.
According to a Gallup study, 76% of employees experience burnout, at least sometimes largely due to overwork and lack of boundaries. Can you believe that? It's almost 80%. I'm so curious when I see a stat that large. I'm always wondering what is the mindset of that other 24% since it is such a minority. I'm so curious about their patterns, their mindset, their self-talk. Because if almost 80% is experiencing burnout because of overwork and lack of boundaries, there's something there, right? There's something so interesting there. Now high achievers often have perfectionistic tendencies. I know that that's something that I've worked on personally. Maybe you have too. There is a strong desire for success.
Kc Rossi (00:08:01) - And this actually this kind of combination of perfectionism and a drive for excellence or success that actually does make us more susceptible for FOMO. There's a fear of missing out on opportunities that could advance careers and personal goals. And this makes sense as you want to rise in your career, have a bigger impact, and also be acknowledged for your hard work and talents.
This constant comparison is draining and counterproductive, and I believe it triggers a commonly shared wound of not-enoughness. Not rich enough, thin enough, cute enough, all the things right? When you spread yourself too thin, the quality of your work suffers and you might meet deadlines, but the excellence and creativity diminish. I'm sure if you're honest with yourself, you've experienced this and "good enough" for people who strive for excellence, has a way of getting under your skin, and secretly sucks the energy out of you. This is not about perfectionism or never being able to call a project "done" with confidence. What I am talking about is having the mental and emotional bandwidth to be fully present.
Kc Rossi (00:09:25) - I mean, just even think about that for a minute. Right, take a deep breath and even allow that to sink in. Just take a pause. Mental and emotional bandwidth to be fully present with yourself, your people, your places, and projects.
When you're present, you are tuned into yourself, your breath, your surroundings. You naturally show up with full vitality, clarity, and energy. I think this is a good time to talk about another, albeit less trendy acronym, which is Jomo. JOMO and Jomo stands for the Joy of Missing Out. For those of you who know me, you know that my signature salutation for years has been Breathe Joy. So I am all about being a joy magnet and attracting more things that spark joy (Nod to Marie Kondo). The joy of missing out is a way to get a newfound perspective and saying no to things, to being fully satisfied with what you choose to be involved with and with whom. This mindset helps you stay present and appreciate what you have, rather than what you might be missing out on.
Kc Rossi (00:10:53) - If you're wondering what Jomo would be like. Then I have an invitation for you. I invite you to do less for one week. This may sound intimidating at first and will take a little unwinding, right? There's a little bit of unwinding our patterns, habits. There's a little bit of unwinding and slowing down our nervous system, and this can actually feel a little anxiety-provoking in some strange way. That may sound like a dichotomy, but I know when I was starting to practice this and I was really being mindful of leaving that white space on my calendar, it did bring up anxiety because I was so wired to jam and cram myself like a robot.
So be easy with yourself, breathe into it, and just look at this as a practice as you shapeshift a new habit. And I just want to let you know I have full confidence in you because it really starts with intention. And if you're interested in this and you have this mindset of like, you know what, let me try it out. Let me try it out.
Kc Rossi (00:12:06) - What would it look like if I flipped the fear of missing out to the joy of missing out? What would that look like? How would I feel? How could I enjoy my family more? How could I enjoy my food more? How could I enjoy all the things that I choose to do? More. And it's like I said, it's going to take a little unwinding as you practice, but it will absolutely be worth it.
So here's the invitation for one week - Do less. What you choose is essential or life-giving. Be mindful of engaging all of your senses. So the things that you're like, you know what? These are the things I want to do. I just want you to have the space to really start being curious and developing deeper relationships with all five senses; your taste, touch, smell, hearing, seeing, and feeling. So chew your food fully, fully present. Practice intuitive eating. Take in the beauty of your surroundings fully - the smells, the colors, feel the softness of your blankets hold you.
Kc Rossi (00:13:23) - Lotion your skin and take the time to experience the kinesthetic qualities of that act of self-care versus rushing through a must-do to-do list.
All right, Asterix here. Okay, this one's probably going to take a little time. I'm noticing it for myself as well. But the, you know, the way to get this kind of full experience in this week is reduce or eliminate your social scrolling. Be open to other ways that you can relish in the joy of missing out. Give yourself permission to say no to things that do not feel expansive.
Lean into the get to mentality I get to, right, I get to. This is a privilege. This is an honor I get to and let go of the got to write the "shoulding" on yourself, the got to obligations that have kept you burdened and exhausted.
I'm personally going to try this starting tomorrow, which is Thursday, June 20th, 2024, marking our summer solstice here in the Northern Hemisphere. Want to join me?
Now. I love the power and the root meanings of words.The word solstice comes from the Latin word sol, which means sun and stidium, which means still or stopped.
Kc Rossi (00:14:55) - Let's use the power of nature and this time to stand still. To help support our endeavor. The solstice is all about bringing in new beginnings. It's a wonderful opportunity to go inwards and sink into self-nourishment for growth.
What do you want to let go of? How about with starting with all of the overs? The overworking, overachieving, overdoing, over-committing, overgiving? Think about that for a minute.
God, what would it be like to let go of all of the overs?
Saying no to opportunities that don't align with your priorities is essential. It's not about rejecting everything, but it is about making space for what truly matters to you. Can you recommit to yourself at this time? Commit to leaving space for joy, air, curiosity. Being okay with white space.
If you have your heart's desire, what would your divine rhythm look and feel like? This is a good question to reflect on and journal on, especially as you set your intention for the new season. To summarize, overcoming FOMO is essential for achieving a healthy work-life balance.
Kc Rossi (00:16:26) - Recognizing FOMO. Step one. Setting clear priorities. Practicing mindfulness. Underscoring. "Practicing" right. Limiting social media and learning to say no will absolutely help you architect your life in your own way for maximum joy and balance.
As Brené Brown wisely said, "Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen. Don't let FOMO drive your life. Show up for what truly matters to you." I love that.
Take a moment today to identify one area where FOMO is impacting you, and apply one of the steps that we discussed. Start small and build from there.
Thank you so much for tuning in to Heart Glow CEO™. If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe, rate, and leave a review. You can head on over to www.lovethepodcast.com/brilliance.
All right. It's such a pleasure to be with you. I really feel connected. I love sharing these ideas that many times get sparked from you, my clients, people that follow me, and it just allows me to riff on this. I truly hope that you have found a spark of inspiration, and I can't wait to pop on here next week.
Kc Rossi (00:17:49) - Until then... Breathe Joy.
