Breaking Free from Not Enough: Reclaiming Your Worth as a Leader
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:00:02 Welcome to Heart Glow CEO™, where high achievers evolve into purpose-driven powerhouses. I'm Kc Rossi, your Integrative Leadership Coach. Join us to break free from people pleasing and burnout, exploring mindset, embodiment, and soul alignment. Discover expert insights, success stories, and actionable tips for wholistic wealth on your terms. This is where transformation meets the modern female leader. Let's go!
Have you ever felt like you're giving everything you've got but still feel like it's not enough? Today we're diving into one of the most common limiting beliefs that's burning out leaders and entrepreneurs - ‘I am not enough.’
Whether in a job with stagnant pay or struggling to find your voice in your own business, this episode is for you. I wanted to give you real-life examples of where Not Enoughness showed up in my client sessions just this week. It is such a pervasive problem that holds back divinely beautiful and powerful women just like you every day. Let's see if we can peel back a few layers and get to the bottom of this together.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:01:20 All right, client number one, and I want to remind you, these were just 3 examples of people that I connected with just this week. That's why I was like, I need to do a podcast episode because when we start to see these patterns come up over and over again, to me it is like this light bulb thing that we have to shine on.
So client number one: The overworked creative who pours her heart and soul into her job but sees no compensation or acknowledgment of her contributions. She's undervalued and exhausted. This was actually a discovery call. This lovely lady is wildly talented in a niche-specific field. She has oodles of hands-on experience and deep-seated, low self-worth. For many years, she has tirelessly given herself and creative IP to the organization she works for, bringing in almost a quarter of $1 million in sales for them per year with just her program alone, I might add. Yet she is compensated with a low wage, lackluster title that doesn't even scratch the surface of her duties, and her job description hasn't been updated in years to include the magnitude of her responsibilities.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:02:40 It is so frustrating. She wants more and is connected to her deep why. She craves to live her life to the fullest and have more time and energy to devote to herself and her grown child. The hold-up? A feeling of not enough, not qualified enough. Although that's really a mind lie. Not worthy enough to charge more, not brave enough to use her voice and be your own best advocate. Not enough energy because all of the energy leaks that have led to bitterness and burnout. It can feel hopeless. And I can guarantee you that it's not.
It is a part of the growth process. You are being challenged by these exact circumstances so that you can rise. I know it doesn't feel like that when you're in the messy middle. You may even feel apathetic and like, why? Why bother? Why even bother? You may resign yourself to just keep doing what you're doing and write it out. But at what risk? Your mental and emotional health? Your financial security? Your life force and joy potential? I don't think so.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:03:52 She asked me, when will this nugget of low self-worth and fear dissolve? My answer was it's currently in process. The fact that she was showing up for herself and asking the question was proof that she's in it. The emotion that arose from the frustration that it's been going on like this for years is evidence that her soul is ready for change. The fact that her hand was raised for support to help dissolve limiting beliefs that have held her back, is a cause for celebration. This is deep work, my friends, and I don't take it lightly.
To me, it is the most important work that we can do here - to question reality, dig deep, do the interpersonal work, and keep showing up for ourselves, our betterment, and the positive ripple effects from our transformation.
I just wanted to breathe into that for a minute. Just breathe into that truth.
All right. Client two. Client two works for a nonprofit organization that's currently experiencing significant turbulence, with team members leaving and uncertainty all around. Despite the chaos, she's a bright, visionary leader with innovative ideas for transforming the organization's culture.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:05:15 But… she's plagued by a deep-rooted sense of not-enoughness, which holds her back from asking for more money or flexibility, even though her contributions are invaluable.
Recently, she was nominated for a prestigious award, something that should have been a moment of pride and celebration. Instead of feeling elated, she was uncomfortable and hesitant to fully embrace the recognition. This is a pattern I often see, especially in the healing professions and nonprofit sectors. These fields attract big-hearted caregivers, which is wonderful. But here's the challenge. These individuals often leave themselves out of the equation. Their focus is on making sure everyone else is cared for, which reinforces the belief that their needs are secondary. When the spotlight shines on their brilliance, they tend to shrink back because it feels unfamiliar and uncomfortable. It's safer to stay behind the scenes, ensuring everyone else is okay, which they believe will make them okay too. Here's where the not enough belief plays out. She feels undeserving of more money or flexibility, even though her value is evident.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:06:36 She downplays her nomination for the award not because she isn't qualified, but because it challenges her internal narrative of not being good enough. She's more comfortable giving and nurturing others than receiving praise or awards, reinforcing the idea that she doesn't deserve the spotlight. There are layers here - deep conditioning around worthiness, the caregiver role, and the fear of stepping into her full power.
It's not just about asking for more. It's about believing that she's worthy of more.
Again, take a deep breath into that. I'm wondering if you're in a position where you've already started to see, like, bits and pieces of yourself and your own story in just these two client examples from this week. And if you are, I just want you to have a lot of space and grace for yourself, because this whole perspective illumination is not about shame and blame. And I know it's often easy to want to kick yourself of like, why do I do this? Why do I keep doing this? Why have I done it for years? And I just really want you to breathe into.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:07:49 You are exactly where you need to be. This is the right moment for you to hear this, and if it's landing, it really makes my heart so happy. Because even though the road ahead had may not be just like butterflies and rainbows of like, yep, boom, Kc said. To have more self-worth and to not feel like I'm not enough, okay? And boom, it happens. Of course not.
We are realistic in our optimism.
So it's literally just about taking a breath and giving yourself the permission to try, try a different way. All right. Lastly client three.
Client three is a prominent and talented doctor who is in the process of creating a masterclass for her audience. As I reviewed her teaching points, it became clear that Not Enoughness was subtly influencing her approach. This case is a bit trickier because the belief doesn't manifest as insecurity on the surface. It shows up as over giving. Here's what I mean. She felt that if three teaching points were good, adding ten would make it even better.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:08:57 It's the belief that more is always better because she's worried that she's not enough. This particular form of not enough is sneaky because it often disguises itself as dedication or excellence. I know this well because I've experienced it myself. Thinking that over delivering would make my work stand out. For years I jam packed my presentations, my coaching sessions, my you name it with excessive information, thinking that it would add value.
Truth be told, I actually had to dig through my archives to find a slide template for her that aligned with best business practices of 3 to 5 key teaching points for a masterclass. Because all of my old decks were overloaded.
Here's the critical point. While over delivering might seem noble, as with my other clients, this behavior is often driven by the fear of not being enough. We think if I just give more, teach more, and do more, then I'll be worthy of recognition. But when we peel back the layers, the reality is that this pattern of overdoing, over giving, and over serving stems from a core wound of not feeling like we're enough as we are.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:10:19 In her case, she's overloading the masterclass content out of a subconscious need to compensate for feeling inadequate. There's a fear that if she doesn't go above and beyond, she won't be perceived as valuable, even though she's already incredibly skilled. The desire to serve others fully comes from a genuine place of wanting to help, but it's also fueled by the underlying belief that her worth is tied to how much she gives. It's a common trap, especially for high achieving professionals, but recognizing it allows her to create content that is clear, focused, and aligned with her true value without the need to compensate.
Again, this is a big one. I still struggle with this. So you know, when I share this information, I'm not sharing it from the place of I've got it all figured out and here's your one, two, three. It's absolutely not like this. I am walking side by side with you in this whole practice of life. This is the journey. Ups and downs. Sometimes we win. Other times we're feeling like, what the hell is going on here? But this whole process of personal and spiritual development, this whole wholistic wealth approach, is to actually take a peek at our physical, our mental, our emotional, our spiritual, our financial, our collective and our collective wealth.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:11:51 And it starts first, in my opinion, within. All right.
Now, let's just look at some root causes of the not enough mindset.
Number one is societal conditioning. We're often taught that our value comes from how much we produce, achieve, and give to others. This leads us to tie our worth to external validation, whether it's a title, paycheck, or someone else's approval, rather than recognizing our inherent value. I feel like even just this one piece, we could go down and have a whole nother hour podcast on.
But let's just suffice it to say to just let's touch on the surface here of why this pervasive, not enough mindset is plaguing people, is holding people back. And even when they see it, it's like I see it and I still can't get out of it. And I think that really pulls in number two, which is this fear of rejection, the fear of asking for more, whether it's a raise, recognition or freedom often stems from a deep seated belief that we're not worthy.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:13:03 It's a cycle. We hesitate to advocate for ourselves. And when we don't receive what we need, it reinforces the belief that we aren't worthy in the first place. And this is bringing up the the quote. Like, if we want to look for something, we are going to find it. And I think that when we are looking for proof of our not enoughness, we can absolutely find it. Wow, this happened, that happened in the other thing happened and look how much they did and nobody even saw it. Like it can be this old mind story that we keep playing on repeat.
And so in order to break the cycle of not enoughness, we actually do have to take some actionable steps.
The top one is really reframing the limiting belief. Taking a moment to identify where this is not enough behavior and where this behavior even originated from. And so one of the things to like as we start to program our reticular activating system, our RAS - R-A-S, we want to start programming it to look for the positive things, to look for the things that are reinforcing, to look for evidence of how am I enough? You can absolutely start reprogramming and recreating new, positive and resourceful neural pathways.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:14:26 When you do a quick journaling exercise, it can be so simple. You can ask yourself, where in my life do I feel like I'm not enough? And reflect on how is this belief shaped my actions, relationships and decisions? And then really imagining and allowing yourself to dream. Dream big. Leave yourself time and space. This is not something where you're going to sit down and in five minutes bang out a one, two, three, right? Because where is the transformation and reflection in that?
So I really want you to breathe into this space of allowing your imagination to take your breath away, to bubble up and cause awe and wonder. What would life be like if I truly believed I was enough?
I mean, maybe you're just going to take some time on that. And I know some clients, they're like, I'm not really a journaler. And I hear that. And there's a lot of different ways that you can reflect, but there is a kind of static property that's actually been backed by science.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:15:32 When you do put pen to paper there is this ability to outpour your conscious stream of thoughts and get it on paper. It might surprise you, so you may want to practice it. You may want to try it on for size. And I'm also a fan of knowing what works for you. So I've suggested to clients that they use a voice recorder on their phone app and actually speak in and do an audio journal, and that has been really helpful for some that really just have this feeling of like, I don't really want a journal, no worries.
But the reflection, the imagination, the pause, the space to ask yourself these deep questions in the objective of reframing your limiting beliefs. That's what's important. That's the takeaway that I really want you to leave with today.
The other piece is, and I know you've heard this a lot, because I talk about burnout and bitterness and all of the things is really setting boundaries and speaking up, and boundaries can be healthy. They don't need to be bitchy.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:16:41 They don't need to be selfish. It is literally about putting yourself into the equation. It's honoring your worth. So one of the things that you can practice with is asking for what you need, whether it's a raise, more flexibility, or recognition for your hard work.
Practice using your voice to advocate for yourself. Why? Because you deserve to receive.
The other piece to this is protecting your time and energy. By setting clear boundaries, you honor your needs, which will ultimately prevent burnout. Remember, over giving isn't a badge of honor. It's a drain on your resources.
The other thing is aligning with your value. Connecting with your deeper purpose. Because you know, when you align with your true mission and bring your full self to the table, the world responds in kind. When you show up authentically, your worth is never in question.
But you know what? You have to believe this first. You have to believe this first, my friend, because all amazing leadership begins with self leadership and that whole concept that your vibe attracts your tribe.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:18:04 It absolutely starts with you believing in your enoughness. With you honoring your worth first, not expecting it from any external circumstance.
I want you to take a deep breath. I want you to feel so grounded in yourself right now. Even if you have to plant your feet, really feel all four corners of your feet on the ground. Line up your spine, relax your shoulders. Just be so easy and so soft with yourself.
And remember this. You are enough just as you are.
Your creativity, your wisdom. Your time. These all carry immense value. You don't need to add anything more to prove your worth. The work now is to believe in yourself, claim what is yours and show up for your growth and well-being.
Take it from the stories we discussed today. Whether you're overworked and underpaid, afraid to ask for more, or overloading yourself to prove your worth. It's time to break free from the limiting belief of not enoughness.
My invitation to you is to reflect and where you might be holding yourself back.
Kc Rossi, PCC 00:19:21 Grab your journal or audio app and work through that belief. Where do you feel not enough? How can you? detach from that mind, lie and reinforce your enoughness?
Part of this is asking what you need to release before you can start owning your value.
Start looking for those clues. Start even making an awesomeness audit, which is really documenting all of the evidence that is showing you right here, right now, in present day, present time, that you are absolutely enough.
If you're ready to go a step deeper into your worth and need some guidance, reach out to me. My absolute favorite thing in the world is to support leaders and entrepreneurs build, grow, and thrive from the inside out.
Until next week, my friend…breath joy!
